Traditionally the Fall months brings the dreaded email about how uncomfortable we’re all going to be for the next few weeks. It also brings out the sweater-adoring, leaf turning, candy corn-loving zealot in most students.

But rest assured. if you don’t count yourself among them, you are not alone. We here at the Eye sympathize with you. For all the hype, the special flavors (more on that tomorrow from The Eye blog-ed), and the inevitable use of the term “sweater weather”, Fall is kind of terrible. Here’s why:

All things pumpkin
Just because a vegetable is in season doesn’t mean it has to be forced into everything. You lovers of Fall can keep your sea-salt choco-pumpkin bambaccinos; I like my coffee black. Pumpkin scones? I’d rather choke on my own vomit.

Halloween…
Where to begin? Halloween (the business partner of Mr. Valentine) and specifically Halloween parties bring out both dance floor daddy issues and terribly cryptic costumes – wearing mascara on one eye does not mean you’re a Clockwork Orange character. Wearing a tie does not make you Patrick Bateman.

Fall is indecisive
One minute it’s shorts and t-shirts, the next you’re awkwardly wielding an umbrella against the snow. Either that or your turtleneck has suddenly trapped your body in a dark chamber of sweat. Fall is like the leftovers of a dinner party— you might say that you prefer it cold the day after but really summer was better.