I came to college for my MRS (not my MS!)
A recent rise in male joblessness has created a worldwide disturbance in the dating market, according to Kate Bolick’s recent article in The Atlantic, entitled “All the Single Ladies.” The pool of marriageable men is overflowing with deadbeats and players. The evolution of the dating scene is a hot topic. When time is of the essence, and marriage o’clock is ticking, the results are noteworthy. More than ever, women are getting married later on, or not at all.
Men are becoming inferior to women in terms of income, educational achievement, and employment prospects. This, says Bolick, has wreaked havoc on traditional marriage and family structures. So, as the eligible New York City bachelor becomes an endangered species, women are turning into the men they would like to marry. Beyonce’s lyrics are more than just praises of girl power; they are facts: girls actually do run the world.
As a woman, I am obviously all for Women’s Rights and gender equality. But, as a woman, I’m also deeply concerned over the decreasing number of suitable bachelors. Granted, the lone spinster is aggregating respect, but I could not, in good conscience, convince my grandmother that this is my chosen path.
In a country that is 50.8 percent female and 49.2 percent male, Mr. Right must be out there. But on the college campuses, which are 57 percent female and 43 percent male, Mr. Right is harder to find than Waldo. This ratio is even more distorted on the Barnard and Columbia campus given that Barnard is, in traditional terms, 100 percent female.
The Guttentag-Secord theory, as explained by Bolick, holds that members of the gender in shorter supply are less dependent on their partners, because they have a greater number of alternative relationships available to them. It provides a shred of hope for any single, heterosexual girl entering the college dating scene. However, in 1988, the theory was put to test by sociologists Scott J. Smith and Katherine Trent, who found that there are radical distinctions among genders.
In low-sex-ratio societies, where women outnumber men, women should have both the social and sexual advantage. Instead, when among a surplus of women, men tend to become more promiscuous and less committal. Apparently, if I want any sort of male attention, not only do I have to start putting out more, but I also have to lower my expectations.
So when are transfer applications due again? After all, I came to college to get my MRS and to meet the future doctor of General Hospital and live happily ever after. Who needs an MS then? Maybe I’m still holding on to my childhood fairy-tales too strongly. If that’s the case, my 20s and 30s (and apparently 40s and 50s) are going to be a rude awakening.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8cD2mv8-_xA
Do women still think this way?
No
Barnard people may
Seriously? Who goes to a girls school to get a husband?
This essay is a joke, isn’t it?
Of course it is! If anyone went to college these days in order to catch a husband, she’d be out of her mind :-) On the other hand, those who are out there catching husbands, should be aware it requires talent too. A college education might help, but it isn’t its purpose.
what a meanspirited article. I mean, as a man who wants to be called “inferior” or a deadbeat. Because we don’t have a wall street job to buy a woman dinner and more?
Is this a joke? if we called women losers and sluts – would we be assailed?
I am weeping right now.
I love it
It’s not us honey, it’s you.
word to this whole article.
good luck to all the columbia/barnard women.
maybe downtown to meet some douchey douchey wall street bankers like my colleagues. NYC is a pond of fish.
love it though, men are at ease. even peasants do well. imagine the 1% like myself
this is abominable.
This is a satire, right?
If this is a joke it isn’t very funny
Babe, it sounds less like everyone else’s problem and more like your own.
This is embarrassing. Why is the student body here always so disappointing? The more people I meet here, the more I wish I went somewhere else.
I don’t think this is a joke. Why is it unreasonable for a woman to be looking for a good guy and want to settle down? Fine, the last line might have been a little ironic, but why are we reacting so badly to someone who says that they want to get married? A family life should not be the only option currently on the table, but plenty of people find deep fulfillment in it. And she’s right. The sex ratio in Morningside Heights is not conducive to it, and sociology, evolutionary psychology and economics backs her up.
Two caveats:
One, a certain strand of guys are using their time at Columbia to prepare to compete with other guys when the ratios are reversed, so they may not be as attuned to the current imbalance as Raquel is. Look for these guys in the Economics department, in political or charity groups, or in a church/synagogue. The introduction of the Financial Econ major should do the work of sorting out the douchey American Psycho types from the nice guys for you.
Two, or you’re an Orthodox Jewish guy. From what I’ve seen in Hewitt, they’re outnumbered 7:1.
CC, right on! This article is witty and clever and is a refreshing breath of truth.
Not only do the natural sciences and history prove this correct, but the statistics in the attached Atlantic article are also on Raquel’s side.
I don’t think Raquel is criticizing the men at Columbia (or the rest of the world). I think she is exploring the problem and searching for ways to cope with the upheaval of traditional mores regarding marriage.
heh heh heh heh Kate Bolick is old and lonely.
Raquel,you are right on. It is refreshing to hear someone address this very real issue. Good for you in writing about something that exists, but nobody talks about. Good luck in finding Mr. Right, if he exists!
That’s the tnhiking of a creative mind
Coming to college for your MRS is absolute disgraceful for the women who are in college to actually learn. There is nothing wrong to say that you’d want to find a suitable other half in your college career. However, I am floored that someone in this modern day and age can still maintain the mindset of a woman from the 1950s.